Sub 220

Pounds, that is. As in the unit of weight measurement. This morning, I weighed in at a somewhat fluffy 218.9 lbs.

That is a total weight-loss of 30.1 since Christmas.

Yesterday, I was pretty discouraged by life, in general. I was down on myself and the way things were going with my job. And, I was felling extremely unmotivated. Even repeating my Standard in my head, and occasionally out loud, didn't seem to help much.

So, I decided that to turn myself around I would go running as soon as I got home. I almost didn't do it though. Life and family, the former being aggravating, the latter enticing, were trying to stop me.

But I went. And it was awesome. I ran about 3.2 miles, my longest run since I was a junior in high school. And I tackled a mega hill. It felt really good.

And then, to top it all off, when I got home I got the best news I had heard in a long time: My wife doesn't have cancer. The awesomeness was definitely on the rise at this point.

Following this morning's awesome weigh-in, I went to the gym and tore it up some more. Then I came to work, which is where I am writing this. So far, it's been pretty good too.

Here's to an amazing day.

Why so Angry?

Since last Thursday I have been having some serious anger issues. I am so mad at the world.

Here is why:

1. Things aren't exactly going amazing at work. If I don't get my sales up, I'm fired.

2. My sister is going through a very bitter and difficult divorce and legal battle for her kids. The effects of which are devastating to all of us. My parents in particular seem emotionally crushed.

3. I haven't exercised our even eaten all that healthy all week. I understand putting personal needs asidefor the greater good, but I feel myself slipping into old habits, re-becoming the person I was. A person I don't want to be.

4. I don't have enough money to buy food, gas, or pay bills. Over the next few months I will have thousands to pay in hospital bills because:

5. (this one is the biggie) My wife, the love of my life, may be dying. We find out soon if this is the case. But, she might have a blood cancer. Her toroidal struet, medical tests and treatments, etc. are draining on us. Mostly on her, but there is also a huge strain on my kids and I.

So there you have it. When I pass you on the freeway and flip you off while profaning you, just know that I'm not really mad at you. If I call you an idiot for rushing into the elevator as soon as opened, even though there were people trying to get out, you are an idiot. But I shouldn't have said it.

And most of all, to my dear wife and kids, I'm sorry for yelling and being ornery. I'm not really mad at any of you. You are wonderful.